For whatever reason, I was feeling really down tonight. I hadn’t seen any good films and nothing was coming up for me to write about. There’s something so empty about being a writer and having nothing to write about. I couldn’t even come up with anything for my journal that I usually write in everyday.
I just needed something to take my mind off of how bad I was feeling and all of it came together when I decided to watch Beyoncé’s Homecoming documentary for the third time. It’s so comical to me that I didn’t write about it sooner, because it definitely filled me with an amazing amount of goodness reserves the first two times I put it on.
As someone who isn’t musical I am just in awe of music artists, so to see Beyoncé’s process around one of the best live performances ever was a dream come true. And it is something I can go back to again and again, especially on a night like tonight where everything seems to be piling up in my anxiety ridden mind.
I’m newly sober for the first time since I was a teen, I am in the process of finding a new place to live, I am in year one of starting a business, my health is kind of a mess, and I am still struggling regulating things like eating and sleeping. It’s been a fun year, lol. And that is why I write this blog: to get myself to remember that no matter how hard or how crazy things get, I can return to movies.
Getting to see someone as successful and hard-working as Beyoncé reveal her own vulnerabilities was exactly what I needed to get my own house in order. If she can overcome all that she did to put on that phenomenal of a performance, then I can certainly face the demons down in my own life. Onward and upward!